{"id":5327,"date":"2021-03-08T16:10:19","date_gmt":"2021-03-08T16:10:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.mindspa.me\/?p=5327"},"modified":"2021-03-08T16:10:19","modified_gmt":"2021-03-08T16:10:19","slug":"how-to-communicate-with-a-masochist","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/en\/how-to-communicate-with-a-masochist\/","title":{"rendered":"How to communicate with a masochist"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Usually, people think that masochists are miserable and helpless people, who are constantly suffering and hurting. But in reality, these seemingly harmless martyrs are quite capable of skillful manipulation. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let\u2019s begin by defining masochistic personal traits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 Masochists are always tormented.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

They suffer a lot; they drown in sorrow. They neglect themselves for the sake of others, tolerate horrible treatment from other people, and are always trying to please. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 Masochists think that suffering and self-neglect is a normal way of life.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Caring about oneself seems to them egotistical, and egoism \u2013 is a deadly sin. Their worldview is as follows: I take care of you and you take care of me \u2013 this is how we will survive. According to masochists, a person should not be taking care of themselves. Therefore, even if something wrong and horrible is happening to them, they are simply waiting for someone else to step in and save them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can often hear from them such phrases: \u201cour Lord suffered, and so should we\u201d, \u201cyou will have to pay for everything\u201d, \u201cmost importantly, you should love others and accept them as they are\u201d \u2013 all of this in the context of suffering.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 Passive aggression<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Masochists mastered passive aggression. They almost never show open aggression. Instead, they punish their \u201coffenders\u201d with silence, demonstrative suffering, refusal to discuss problems, and so on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The goal of this passive aggression to make the person feel guilty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 Unending caring.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

One that makes you want to escape.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Masochists sincerely believe that they know what others need. When they are doing something for us, they never wonder whether we need it. They know better. But if you try to decline their help, you immediately run into a terrible resentment, and lamentations about \u201cyou do not appreciate me\u201d, \u201cI cannot please you with anything\u201d, \u201cnobody needs me\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 Irritation.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is an important signal. If you feel some inexplicable annoyance when you are communicating with a person, while they are not doing anything bad, quite possible that they are a masochist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2713 Refusal to make decisions.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Masochists categorically don\u2019t want to solve their problems. If you try to suggest some solution, in return you will hear \u201cyes, but\u201d in the best-case scenario, or \u201cyou are just trying to get rid of me\u201d in the worst-case.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How to communicate with masochists?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n