{"id":6000,"date":"2021-08-09T21:17:28","date_gmt":"2021-08-09T21:17:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.mindspa.me\/?p=6000"},"modified":"2021-08-09T21:17:28","modified_gmt":"2021-08-09T21:17:28","slug":"fear-of-death-how-to-fight-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/fear-of-death-how-to-fight-it\/","title":{"rendered":"Fear of death \u2013 how to fight it?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-full is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-6001\" width=\"259\" height=\"178\" srcset=\"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto.jpg 960w, https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto-600x413.jpg 600w, https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto-64x44.jpg 64w, https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto-300x206.jpg 300w, https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto-768x528.jpg 768w, https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto-18x12.jpg 18w, https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/Nuovo-progetto-500x344.jpg 500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 259px) 100vw, 259px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>As we understood, the fear of death lowers the quality of life a great deal. This equation is quite simple. And, of course, like any other phobia, you should not ignore it because every one of us deserves a life that is filled not with fears and anxieties, but with harmony and peacefulness.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Why should you get rid of phobias? Let\u2019s imaging that a person is afraid of flying by airplane. They have been living in the City N their whole life and never flew anywhere, and are not planning on it. Is it OK if they don\u2019t spend all their resources on psychotherapy to fight this phobia? We think that it\u2019s OK since the person never encounters their phobia \u201cface to face\u201d so to speak. But, what if a person needs to take a plane once a month for work? In this case, they will be spending enormous amounts of energy on anxiety and they must do something about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>In addition to the obvious detrimental influence of the fear of death, it&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>&#8212;<\/strong> destroys relationships with other people (excessive control, for example, doesn\u2019t make them stronger).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>&#8212;<\/strong> affects your health \u2013 you can get heart, stomach, or other diseases.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>&#8212;<\/strong> provokes the development of different types of addiction since the person needs to hide from reality, and this is most easily accomplished by using alcohol, drugs, games, etc.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>&#8212; <\/strong>leads to different types of psychosomatic disorders.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If your fear became big and inflated, if it shows up regardless of whether there is a real danger, if it consumes a lion\u2019s share of your time and attention \u2013 you probably will not be able to deal with it on your own. It makes sense to seek professional help, preferably among specialists on cognitive-behavioral or existential therapy.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>A psychologist will help you:<br><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li> To figure out what is the launching mechanism of this fear in your case. We already mentioned that there may be many different reasons.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li> To lower the intensity of obsessive thoughts, anxiety, and panic attacks.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li> To return the fear of death to its \u201cnormal\u201d state so that you could live without constant anxiety in the background.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p><br><strong>How should you try to fight the fear of death?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>First of all, you need to acknowledge that it is impossible to get rid of it completely. This fear is one of the basic instincts: it is built into us.&nbsp; Reminders about death are all around: when seasons change, when everything in nature falls asleep (or dies?) before the winter, in grey hair that we notice on the comb, in death announcements of the famous actors whom we\u2019ve known since childhood. This is why we are not trying to completely remove this fear, we just want to soften it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If the fear of death is a byproduct of some psychological trauma, anxiety disorder, or panic attacks \u2013 then you should deal with the underlying cause. In this case, the fear of death is not a disease but only a symptom. When you solve the underlying problem, the fear of death will go away too since it is no longer needed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But if your phobia is strong, then there may be different ways to fight it \u2013 it depends upon the approach chosen by your psychotherapist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It is useful to confront your fear and \u201ctake it apart\u201d. It may be scary, but if you don\u2019t face your fear you will not be able to overcome it.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Here is the plan of action:<br>                                                                                                                                                                                                                         1)<\/strong> Acknowledge the problem. \u201cI have this fear and I am not trying to drown it out, cover it with activities, food, alcohol, etc.\u201d<br>                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            <strong>2)<\/strong> Give up your illusions. Look at your fear without rose-colored glasses.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It means that you need to accept the fact of death \u2013 no person can live eternally. And is it even worth it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Once you accept the inevitability of death, your thought process may change a great deal. And your thoughts, as we know, affect your emotions and behaviors.<br><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>3) <\/strong>Analyze your fear.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What exactly am I afraid of? What does it mean to me? Every person can describe the fear of death differently. What is your fear? What scares in death you, specifically?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Are you afraid that you will go to hell? Or that your child will grow up without love and support? Are you afraid of prolonged illness and suffering? Or maybe that there will be nothing left after you are gone and you will be forgotten?\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>All of these personal fears are different and you need to work on your specific fears and their meanings.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Anne was very afraid of death. This fear was always present in her thoughts. She never told anyone about it because she was embarrassed by her \u201cabnormality\u201d, as she thought. But once, on an airplane, she started a conversation with the woman next to her. Suddenly, as if at confession, she told her all about her worries. The woman asked Anne \u201cWhat are you really afraid of?\u201d Anne thought for a while and admitted that most of all she is afraid to leave alone her disabled sister whom she was taking care of. The woman gave her the phone number of the organization that takes care of disabled people. Anne called them the next day and signed a contract authorizing them to take care of her sister in case of Anne\u2019s death. Her fear immediately disappeared \u2013 it no longer made sense.&nbsp;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Through cognitive-behavioral therapy, the person learns to change their wrong thought patterns and to give up fruitless attempts to control everything. Death will come regardless of how long and how much you worry about it. You need to accept this thought and let it into your consciousness\u2026\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We highly recommend reading the book by Irvin Yalom \u201cStaring at the Sun\u201d. This incredible psychologist studied the fear of death his whole life. In this book, he collected a huge number of examples from his practice.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Yalom reminds us that ideas, even if they may seem like mere words, have a lot of power. Quotes of writers and philosophers from many epochs help us deal with the fear of death and find the meaning of life. And this is exactly what a person immersed in the abyss of fear needs.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In this book, there are many examples of such thoughts. Those that helped Yalom in his work with people fearing death are the most valuable.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Gregory periodically was consumed by the fear of death. Once, when he was looking through a book of famous quotes that he found on a bus, we read a quote by Epicurus: \u201cDeath does not\u00a0concern us, because as\u00a0long as we exist,\u00a0death\u00a0is not here. And when it does\u00a0come, we no\u00a0longer exist.\u201d And suddenly, Gregory felt relief\u2026 When we exist \u2013 death is not here. And this is great news! I can continue living because now I\u2026 can do it! And when death comes \u2013 it will not concern me.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To face the fear of death, it is important to learn to live \u201chere and now\u201d. And this is a science \u2013 and not a simple one!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The feeling of loneliness also makes the fear of death stronger. You need to try to lessen it by developing empathy and by building deeper and more meaningful relationships with people. Then the fear of death will decrease.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What to do if you are not concerned about your death, but the death of a loved one literally paralyzes you?\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>First and foremost \u2013 analyze the situation. What caused this fear? Where did it come from? What are its characteristics? Do not ignore the most troubling moments\u2026 It is very important to \u201ctake apart\u201d the fear so that every detail is separate and you could study it with the utmost attention.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you are very afraid for your loved ones, it may be a disguised fear of your own death. Maybe, it is so scary to admit it, that you see it indirectly, through the fear for others. In this case, you need to work on it specifically.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sometimes, we assign to another person the ability to protect us from anxiety and senselessness, and even give them the crown of \u201cthe meaning of life\u201d. In this case, our excessive attachment becomes the cure for the fear of death and loneliness. In some sense, we are \u201cusing\u201d the other person to address our needs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Valerie was very afraid to lose her parents. During the pandemic, her fear became so strong that she could no longer deal with it on her own. She became mentally and emotionally exhausted &#8212; she said so when she came to see a psychologist. There, for the first time, she said \u201cI will not survive without them!\u201d Then it became obvious \u201cwhat\u201d she needs to work on.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It is better to analyze together with a therapist who can \u201chold your hand\u201d metaphorically when you want to close your eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Remember that you are just a human who can\u2019t influence what will happen. If your anxiety makes you want to control everything, like Sujatha, who was trying to make sure that her second husband doesn\u2019t have a heart attack, then you need to remind yourself that control is an illusion or self-deception. You don\u2019t have such powers and abilities\u2026 for better or for worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And finally, we would like to tell you the following: realizing the finiteness of our existence may not be a curse but a gift. It is not in your power to influence when and how your life will end. But it is up to you how you fill your today. There are no second chances &#8212; you need to use this one! You certainly have \u201ctoday\u201d \u2013 and this is already a lot!<\/p>\n\n\n<div align=\"center\">\n<div class=\"alt-notice\" align=\"center\"><b><font color=\"white\">UNLOCKING MENTAL WELLBEING<\/font><\/b><\/p>\n<p>Self-therapy can be an essential tool for personal growth and self-improvement.<br \/>Browse through our <a href=\"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/courses\/\" rel=\"noopener\"><u>courses<\/u><\/a> and see the positive changes they can bring to your life.<\/p>\n<p>You are not sure where to begin?<\/p>\n<div align=\"center\">\n<p class=\"product woocommerce add_to_cart_inline example-cart-button\" style=\"border: 0px;\"><a class=\"button product_type_simple add_to_cart_button ajax_add_to_cart\" href=\"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/en\/psy-tests\/\" rel=\"nofollow\">TAKE A FREE TEST<\/a><\/p>\n<p class=\"buttons\" style=\"border: 0px;\"><a class=\"button product_type_simple add_to_cart_button ajax_add_to_cart\" href=\"https:\/\/mindspa.typeform.com\/to\/za9nGe8T\" rel=\"nofollow\"><small><u>or get a free consultation<\/u><\/small><\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>As we understood, the fear of death lowers the quality of life a great deal. This equation is quite simple. And, of course, like any other phobia, you should not ignore it because every one of us deserves a life that is filled not with fears and anxieties, but with harmony and peacefulness.&nbsp; Why should&hellip;&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/fear-of-death-how-to-fight-it\/\" class=\"\" rel=\"bookmark\">Leggi tutto &raquo;<span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Fear of death \u2013 how to fight it?<\/span><\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6001,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"neve_meta_sidebar":"","neve_meta_container":"","neve_meta_enable_content_width":"","neve_meta_content_width":0,"neve_meta_title_alignment":"","neve_meta_author_avatar":"","neve_post_elements_order":"","neve_meta_disable_header":"","neve_meta_disable_footer":"","neve_meta_disable_title":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[2,5],"tags":[102,550,722,883,1120,1412,1522],"class_list":["post-6000","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-eng","category-mental-health","tag-anxiety","tag-fear","tag-insecurity","tag-mindspa","tag-psychology","tag-terror","tag-welfare"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6000","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6000"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6000\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6001"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6000"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6000"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindspa-dev.ru\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6000"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}